Understanding Physical Intimacy in American Marriages

Recent research indicates that not all married couples in America experience frequent physical intimacy. A study from the General Social Survey by NORC at the University of Chicago reports that 32.5% of married adults surveyed had no sexual activity in the past year. Only 4.1% reported engaging in sexual activities more than three times weekly.

Sexual Frequency and Standards

Dr. Anna Elton, a licensed marriage and family therapist and clinical sexologist based in Massachusetts, explains that sexual frequency varies among couples. The national standard hovers around once weekly. A ‘sexless marriage,’ according to this expert, involves less than ten intimate occasions annually.

Factors Impacting Intimacy

Intimacy decline can result from various factors, such as busy family schedules or hormone imbalances. Commonly, the initial relationship spark diminishes.

The definition of a ‘sexless marriage’ is ten or fewer intimate occasions annually.

Suggestions for Revitalizing Intimacy

1. Maintain a Positive Outlook

For couples facing challenges in their marriage or sex life, Elton suggests focusing on positive aspects initially. Recognize and share positive relationship moments with partners, as this shift can improve the overall connection.

Conversations in long-term relationships tend to revolve around logistics. Avoid neutral or negative interactions.

In clinical practice, stress and lost connection prevent many women from desiring intimacy. Emphasizing gratitude can positively alter relationship dynamics.

Selecting a tech-free night encourages partners to reconnect emotionally.

2. Reintroduce Fun

Elton notes that couples struggling with intimacy often lack fun, which was present at the beginning of their relationship. A-to-Z date nights can rejuvenate desire by introducing novelty to dating activities.

Examples include axe-throwing or art gallery visits for ‘A’, and bowling or beach for ‘B’.

Elton shares a favorite: a ‘M’ night consisting of a movie and a massage, contributing to connection and desire.

3. Reignite Flirting and Attraction

Flirting, usually diminishing over time, can spark intimacy. Elton recommends creating a new flirting language and engaging in activities enhancing erotic intentions.

Intimate gestures like a 20-second hug or a six-second kiss can increase oxytocin.

Aging and stress can decrease self-desire, affecting how advances from partners are received. Small self-care acts and physical contact can strengthen personal and partner connections.

Angelica Stabile is a lifestyle journalist for Fox News Digital.