Honoring Soldiers of the Battle of Ben Cui

Maj. John Snodgrass offers a benediction at a ceremony to honor soldiers who fell in the Battle of Ben Cui during the Vietnam War. This event is held at the gravesite of Staff Sgt. Marvin Rex Young in Odessa, Texas.

My father, former Army Staff Sgt. Tom Frame, constantly reflects on his comrades who fought and perished alongside him in Vietnam. Recently, for Veterans Day, he and others from his unit have been visiting Texas, home to Staff Sgt. Marvin Rex Young. Young was among the 18 men who died in the ferocious combat at Ben Cui between my dad’s unit and the North Vietnamese forces.

These visits serve as a means for my father to reconnect with fellow soldiers. During a trip to Texas last summer, he found a way to honor Young and the others who lost their lives in the battle. It marked the 50th anniversary of Ben Cui, a poignant milestone that my father commemorated by organizing a unit reunion on August 21, the date of the battle.

I inquired about his motives for gathering the veterans. He replied, “It’s my duty.” Yet, my father requires no specific occasion to remember. “I wake up and see a beautiful morning, and I think of them,” he shared. He often questions why he survived when others did not, a thought that burdens him and our family manifesting as post-traumatic stress disorder.

His PTSD primarily emerges as sudden, irrational anger. This intense rage has effects on our family. I notice similar behavior in myself and my siblings. My outbursts damage relationships and are best tempered with solitude.

My father has progressed in managing his PTSD by engaging in discussions about the war with fellow veterans. Nonetheless, it’s a constant struggle. This summer, I joined him at the reunion to see if recalling the tragic day with other soldiers would aid his healing process.

On the morning of the anniversary in Odessa, Texas, my parents and I visited the grave of Rex Young at Sunrise Memorial Gardens. We gathered with other veterans and families in the chapel. At 11:10 a.m., a call to arms played over loudspeakers. Fifty years earlier, my dad’s unit, part of the 5th Infantry Regiment, was set for a reconnaissance mission.

There were 88 soldiers, some on foot navigating dense brush and others in armored personnel carriers. Photos by combat reporter Sgt. Don Mousseau illustrate the severity of the fire they faced. Shots erupted, and a sniper immediately claimed one life and wounded another, igniting chaos. “Medic Gary Young mentioned it felt like rain,” my father recalled. “It was bullets.”

A retreat ensued, leaving 18 men on the battlefield. This unresolved outcome has haunted my father. “Could anyone have survived out there?” he often wonders.

After the memorial service concluded with a prayer, there was lunch at a nearby club. Veterans conversed over desserts, sharing stories. “Decades ago, such discussions were rare,” my father noted. “We were so upset with our government and the nation’s attitude that we buried the memories and moved on.” Now, discussing experiences is crucial for healing.

Pvt. Nick Fasselin recounted his first day in the field during the Battle of Ben Cui. Later, he saved my father’s life. I embraced Pvt. Abe Cardenas, the last to see Rex Young alive. I also conversed with Maj. Gen. Andy Anderson, who, despite medical advice, attended to honor his fallen soldiers.

Though my father still seeks peace, this day offered some solace. “Being with them helps,” he admitted. “They are my men.” Yet, the reality of survival remains a challenge he can’t easily overcome. “I’ll never fully reconcile with that,” he confessed, “not until I’m gone.”